Dogs

I feel bad for animals with tails constantly getting stuck in their ass. How do they get it out. Thats why dogs wag their tails. To make sure they dont get stuck. Chasing their tails is to make sure they are still there.

Video Games

Mario doesn't make sense to me. He gets a leaf, then randomly turns into a raccoon. Thats like Mario getting a brain, then turning into George Bush, it just doesn't make sense. And Luigi, poor guy, hes the tall in shape one. Mario is fat and lazy and short. And Bowser. That dude's got some serious anger issues. Oh and of course darling Peach. Getting captured every other day. Poor Mario.

Sicknesses

Yep, I'm sick. It sucks. But what sucks even worse is the crap you have to suck on. I woke up yesterday and my throat was on fire. I had to suck on this cough drop type thingy that looks like cherry candy, smells like cherry candy, but otherwise has no other properties of cherry candy. After I popped it into my mouth, my mouth was on fire! The taste was more unbearable than the throat ache. What sucked worse (pun intended) was the fact that it was freezing cold and I had to go outside with the crap in my mouth. And I don't know if you know this, but I am not one to keep my mouth shut. So I had burning inside my mouth, pain in my throat, all the while freezing air was going through my mouth. I tried to shut my mouth but the pathetic-ness of it all made me keep laughing. I was in burning/freezing hell. Next day, throat's no better, and I get a headache, a cough (which to anyone who's ever had a burning throat and a cough they know it's no picnic) and a runny nose. Worst part is I STILL had to go to school. AND HEBREW SCHOOL! AND THAT MEETING MY MUM HAD TO HAVE WITH MY TEACHER BECAUSE IM AN IDIOT AND SHE JUST NEEDED TO LET HER KNOW THAT! Misery day!! But isn't everyday?

GPS Systems

So this summer I went to the poconos. Fun time with my grandparents. He had an antique typewriter. In other words he had a typewriter. Anyway, fun time, then we went home. And our FREAKIN GPS SYSTEM got us lost. What was supposed to be a half hour drive took us almost 4. And this is from Philadelphia to Mount laurel. Our GPS (Lola) was absolutely crazy. It was like: "Right turn at the left area, then go up." I was like waaaa? I was afraid this was gonna end up like that movie Eagle eye.

"Turn Right Shia. Then walk five steps and you'll see a man with a briefcase. The go up.....in flames"

Now I'm scared. We were going in circles for hours. Why do people use the GPS systems? Like imagine Nascar drivers with a GPS. What would that be like?

"Left turn, followed by a left turn, followed by a left turn, followed by a left turn..."

What, are people getting lost on the track? Having to stop to ask for directions? They'd get hit with a car going a million miles an hour. These things are insane. I feel like they are going to like rise up against humanity or something.

They are going to tell us to all go up...in flames. I'm scared.